I mean Wow! Can you believe it? How long have we been waiting to see what we saw tonight? Something so big and so underestimated. When the unsung hero finally gets her due. And I'm not talking about Melissa Lawson winning Nashville Star, I'm talking about Katie Cook's outfit.
Wow! You don't see her wearing THAT on CMT. She looked incredible, but WOW! Katie can Cook! And then to hear her say, "Tonight we will reveal......." Yeah, I'd say so! It's pretty obvious what you're revealing tonight. I didn't hear a word she said, because I just kept saying "WOW!"
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Even Bush was like "is THAT Katie Cook?!?!"
OK, I need to calm down. And what can I do to calm down? Let's watch Billy Ray Cyrus perform "Achy Breaky Heart" with the remaining Nashville Star contestants. Do you think he gets tired of performing that song? I mean, seriously? At what point do you
??? That song was so big that his bus driver had an 8x10 with his picture that said "Achy Breaky Busdriver." No lie. The performance was ok, but I wish they would have rearranged the song and maybe put an abrupt ending first or something. The dancers came back and that was cool because I've always said, "If you're going to be hokey, make sure you have dancers". And then the remaining contestants came out and that helped at least. I really shouldn't be complaining, because maybe that's as good as it gets with that song. It's like the Macarena. It'll never go away. 
It was cool that they brought all the former contestants back. You forget who got ousted early. I will have to say that the sound this week seemed to be worse than it was all season. I just didn't feel like the vocals were cutting enough. Gabe Garcia sang "Celebrity" and it was an ok performance but he looked nervous the whole show. Then we had Melissa sing "My Wish" and she really sang it well! Looked like a real pro. She deserves the win and I think her honesty and genuine realness helped her appeal to a wide number of voters out there.
Next we had another technical glitch or something because when Billy Ray was introducing Shawn and trying to make a point or joke or something about the boots John Rich gave him, we never saw the boots, but we did catch John talking to the producers. I'd love to know what they are telling him.
The final contestant left was Shawn and she sang a Nashville Star alum song by Miranda Lambert called, "Gun Powder and Lead" but I thought she spent too much energy selling it and not enough singing it because she sounded like she was out of breath and it was tough to hear. But it doesn't really matter, because the votes are already in!
They decided to bring in a couple of guests to do some more last minute mentoring by the one and only George Jones and also Blair Garner. More on him in a bit, but what was Gabe wearing on his feet? Are those Jewel's shoes?!
Next they brought in Blair Garner who is the host of a syndicated radio show called
it's on across the country and you'll never guess what time it's on? Oh, did you say "after midnight?" I'm so proud of you! The interesting thing is that he's in radio, but good luck convincing his plastic surgeon of that. Speaking of that, did you see Bo and Hope are getting married again? I remember watching Days when I was a kid with my Mom, and it had Steve "Patch" Johnson, and Kayla, although he called her "Sweetness"
It was shocking to see Hope these days. I'm not sure if that's Hope, or a tranny named Bo.
Wouch!
Alright, Elimination Time! and unfortunately it's Shawn Mayer. I was kinda pulling for her but I thought her chances were slim to win. And what if Gabe got eliminated? Does that mean that Shawn and Melissa would sing the Righteous Bros "Time of My Life" to each other? That would have been awkward. Unless you like Melissa Etheridge or the Indigo Girls, or follow the girls minor league hockey team, the Bangor Lumberjacks.
It's like my friend Becca said, "If Melissa tries that move from Dirty Dancing with Gabe.......he's screwed!"
Now I know why he looked so nervous!
Well they have it narrowed down to Gabe and Melissa. Katie Cook said something about there never being a Hispanic superstar in country music. That's not true, what about Neal McCoy?
Ha! I only say that because I know Neal would laugh at that! He's a great guy and he's not hispanic, he's of Filipino descent. But what about Rick Trevino?
Wow there's an old one. OK, so he wasn't so much a superstar, but he does have quite the following.
Alright let's get back to see who wins this thing. Of course we already know it's Melissa Lawson and I can say I would have been excited for any of the top 3 to win, but I think America chose properly. Congrats to you Melissa and your hubby for even trying to juggle such an undertaking and winning! I hope you inspire thousands more!
I do have to laugh though, because at the end of the show someone lost their minds with the confetti cannons! The poor girl is belting out her new single called, "What If It All Goes Right?" and confetti is raining all over her.
It's even going into her mouth and she's trying to sing and it keeps going into her mouth.
But I have to hand it to her, she didn't lose her composure, she just whisked it away and kept singing! The full title of that song should be, "What If It All Goes Right (down my throat while I'm trying to sing on national television?)"
You also have to be excited for her family which apparently dressed with the luck of the Irish. I thought this was a great picture of her kids. Guess which one is on Ritalin and which is on Robitussin?
Well it's been a great season, filled with many ups and downs and I thought it was quite entertaining the whole way through. The judges were great and Katie can Cook did great, but I'd ditch Billy Ray next year or at least get him Hooked on Phonics.
I hope you've enjoyed a chuckle or two and for those of you that kept coming back to read the blog, thanks for all the kind words and please leave a message for the higher-ups if you want me back next year. In the mean time you can see me in comedy clubs, hear me on XM and Sirius Comedy Channels or visit me at www.myspace.com/wixwichmann and leave a comment there.
Cheers! And as always, leave a message at the beep (BEEP)]]>
......... who Bedazzled his face. 
put on a concert in each hometown to raise money to assist kids who need to drop out of high school, but just can't afford it. Every year thousands of musical geniuses are way too smart for high school, and yet forced to stay in. This program helps them drop out early enough to get to their true calling of making music. Drop outs like these 
Or watching Zane Lamprey's Three Sheets. 
Do you know how hard it is too find a picture with 15 1/3rd people? 
performance that I'd expect from him, with his banal rendition of "Sweet Home Alabama". An nteresting interpretation of the song, but still, very ordinary in the big picture. He also got quite a warm LA welcome and even a star on the walk of fame! 
Pat Benatar..........ever. Here's a crazy idea, how about a country song, or more originals? 
By the way, did you hear what he had to say about turning 75? He said he's outlived his rooster. 
And I'm paraphrasing that a little. But country music has always been about the common man. 
Rap music has always been about degrading women and extravagance. 
And Polka music 
has always been annoying. 
So originals night was a complete surprise to me!! Every song was way better than I expected. So let's get to 'em!]]>
Whaaaat? Really? C'mon. I still feel he doesn't belong this far in the competition, and I certainly have trouble believing he's better that Ashlee but this probably falls into the disclaimer of real small text they flash at the end of the show. Nonetheless, the performance was pretty good, but to go on song strength, his was the weakest. I agreed with Jeffrey when he said it was "novelty" because I hate when people just put a bunch of random country adjectives together. Like there's some kind of checklist 
of words that you have to have. 
"Fishing?" 
But it was a catchy enough tune and it was true to who he is, so I guess I have to swallow my grits and move on. 
If you've never heard the album, please don't consider yourself a country fan. Anyway we couldn't even get it to chart because Bruce was too new, but it had nothing to do with the song. Fast forward a few years and King George Strait cuts it and releases it to be his 55th #1. And I believe all of those songs after Coffey had the potential to be cut by an established artist in country today, and they would be a hit. Coffey's could be cut by Colt Ford 
and not be a hit. 
of the show. They say some folks can't carry a tune in a bucket. Take me for example, I like to drink and I like to sing, but I've found that most people would rather listen to me drink than sing. If Melissa can carry a tune in a bucket, I think it would be this one 
John Rich keeps telling her to "stay in focus" which I guess means John needs to see the optometrist 
is Shawn Mayer! Skirting and flirting in the bottom a few times now, she might be playing this thing right, because I think it could come down to her and Gabe possibly. An outstanding song and one that you could hear on the radio today. 
contestants were axed this week and they got it done in half the time. Kicking off this week's show was Sailor Tommy being...uh......kicked off this week's show. It came down to him or Melissa, and America made him walk the plank.
involved here? It's hard for me to say this, but I agree with John Rich. This guy is not country. And then to do "Proud Mary"?! That's like the most cliche' song ever. That's like asking a blues band to play "Mustang Sally", or yelling "Freebird" at a country bar. I can't believe he made it this far. I will say that John Rich was a little dramatic to ask Coffey if he could open for Keith Urban with that performance. C'mon John, do you know who is opening up for Keith Urban? Yeah, Carrie Underwood 
and YOU couldn't come close to filling those stilettos either.
and spilled shots 
make me well up like a little girl.
I'd like to go die now."
found out that her mother passed away just minutes before showtime. Everyone was shocked that she not only didn't cancel, but she proceeded to give one of the most touching performances I've ever seen. It was in honor of her mom and it was truly inspiring. I still get chill bumps thinking about it.
but more than that it just felt like not much had changed from week 1. He's still a soulful singer who looks forced to sing country. I think everyone was expecting him to turn on the country, but after 3 weeks it hasn't happened. Which bums me out because I was pulling for him from the beginning. Do you know when he did look country? When I thought he was going to walk off stage and stomp a mud hole into John Rich for saying he's not country. Wouldn't that have been something?
"Say uh, Jed, did he just say we wusn't country?!"
Besides having a cool style, I want Tommy to stick around so I can continue to use funny Navy pictures like this one. 
at the judges comments. Did you hear those word choices?
or Charlotte Church, 
or even LeAnn Rimes. 
I like their harmonies and I think with the right management they could be a viable commodity in country music.
I think we all know who didn't get enough attention in that house.
that scared the hell out of me, because that's been going on in music for years. 
I'm pretty sure it's one of White Chapel's song lyrics that says:
That's stone cold country!
when I hear the theme of the show is Pop Goes Country. It's a cool idea, except it seems a little premature. Shouldn't this be farther down the line as a more challenging obstacle for the blessed few to show their versatility at the end?
. Take a pop song and make it country. Then what's with the dancers? Aren't we trying to find a country artist? Country is "3 chords and the truth". I understand needing bells 'n whistles to sell the show, but the dancers were too distracting to me. It would be like saying this picture is country because she's wearing a cowboy hat......"ok, but what about the clothes and swords?!"
but I think this completely fits their image much like Gabe's song choice did. And I can't remember which is which, but did you see non-braces working the camera? She looked right into it and it was like she knew I wasn't wearing pants.....whoa what? Hang on, did John Rich type that? Is he creeping everyone out or just me with his "turning me on" comments? And what's with the slumber party critiques? They're kids, let 'em be kids! I keep waiting for him to say, "Let's get rid
but there are some folks out there who are Negative Nancy's. 
Put Taylor and Trace up against the same scrutiny as the contestants. 
good Lord I think I could see his bullet holes.
I think it's because the bubblegum headed guy reminds me of Toddy from the Wedding Crashers.
He kind of comes across as a mimbo and I agreed with the judges that he's just going through the motions. "Phoning it in" as they say. I thought this was a better performance than last time but he still just seems to be focusing more on looks than soul. John Rich said he was "sweet", I didn't agree with that so much, but I know what he was alluding to. High marks on the song choice though with The Plain White T's "Hey There Delilah". I like when people take pop songs and countrify them. Like Jack Ingram doing "Lips of Angel" by Hinder. A great song is a great song no matter what genre. I also predict that he'll get farther in the contest than he deserves just because I think he will get a lot of the little girl's votes as a teenage heart throb. 
.
Alright already! I get it. Your dream is coming true. 
You're doing it for your Mom, 
You're doing it for your daughter.
The best part about his pre-produced segment is the sailor in the back ground making funny faces. I shot beer out my nose when I watched that. I thought this kid was great. Very engaging, distinctive voice. He'll end up in the Top 5 at least. Can't wait to hear more from him. Plus he's stationed in Japan which is where I went on a USO tour. That's where I went into a country bar in Hiroshima and heard the owner, Kuwateson, sing "On The Load Again," no lie.
I know they don't really look alike, but they're both mechanics and cute. I think the judges were completely accurate about her performance being "like a bar band" and underwhelming, but I'd also still like to see more from her. She seemed like she was trying too hard and over-selling it. In fact I'd say the only thing good about the "glitter boobs" is that it made for a visual metaphor. Because I like boobs, and I like glitter, but together it was too much and it distracted, rather than accentuated her performance.
You know like in those Vytorin commercials where they compare people to their cholesterol and they look like different foods? Performance wise, I really like this guy. He looks like the type of guy you want to hang out with. He was always in the stands having a good time while others looked intimidated. Did you see some of the contestants faces when the other contestants were performing? Wow. It's funny to see people when they don't realize the camera is on them. Anyway I'm eager to see more of him. I like his versatility both in style and delivery. A little too much over-singing, but I'd rather have that than under-singing.
baking powder. Ladies and Gentleman please welcome Laura & Sophie." And wow could they sing! 7 years together and you can tell. It was like they were finishing each other's sentences. I also thought the vocal arrangements were fantastic. I've got them in the Top 3!
But she definitely had chutzpah! Need more!
We'd go out to dinner with the radio station guy and then they'd bust out the instruments right there and sing like songbirds. This was before they started clucking. I love the Dixie Chicks and still support them. But it was hard for me to be objective on that song. Need more. Feed me Seymour!
