Let's Call The Whole Thing Off
Posted August 03, 06:12 PMSome traditions come from a place of reverence and a sense of history. Others are born out of honor and respect. And then there are those traditions that only could happen because of sheer laziness.
This is one from that last category.

This is a bottle of Clamato Juice. (From concentrate!)
According to it's website, Clamato juice (is it correct to call it a "juice", or is it considered something else?) is described as "A robust tomato clam cocktail, seasoned with secret spices". Hopefully, one of those spices is strychnine, because if I had to drink this thing I wouldn't want to have to live out the rest of my life with the memory of what it tastes like. But that's just me.
The reason that I bring this up is because this Monday, August 6th, will mark the 9th anniversary of this bottle of Clamato being with us here at Late Night with Conan O'Brien - and specifically with Script Supervisor Andrea Kail (and the rest of the Script Department). NINE YEARS. That's insane!! She describes how this could've possibly happened:
"9 years ago French Stewart was a guest on the show (ep. #972) and he was promoting Clamato and I guess they sent over a box of the stuff, and somehow a bottle of it came to me... As a joke, we put the bottle up on top of the file cabinet, daring anyone to drink it - no one did, of course. And the next thing we knew, it had been there for several years.
So now it's even more gross and has become a thing for us in the script department. It came with us when we moved across the street to our temp offices and was prominently displayed above my desk and now it has pride of place on top of the book case in our new office. I keep meaning to buy one of those lucite cases you put game winning footballs in. One of these days, I'm going to get around to it. "
I don't think that I'm remiss in stating that, after being a part of our show for nine years, this bottle of Clamato juice has become an honorary staff member! The bottle has even shown up in the occasional sketch here and there, cementing its glorious and horrid tasting legacy in the hallowed halls of television history!! Nice work, Senor Clamato!
Mr. Clamato, I'm not sure if you can use the internet or not, but if you're reading this, I'd just like to say thank you. Thank you for all your hard work and dedication over these past nine years. You've seen a lot - Andy's departure, the temporary offices, the new offices - and you are an old and wizened bottle of disgusting clam and tomato taste. Even though you may be a freak in the beverage world, to all of us here at Late Night you'll always just be a frankensteinian mutant of two unholy flavors that makes our stomachs curl whenever we look at you. Senor Clamato: What I'm trying to say is, in the words of The Golden Girls theme song, "Thank you for being a friend".
Now the only question that remains is... Is it Clam-A-to? Or Clam-AH-to?!
Aaron Bleyaert
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