You Asked For It...

First of all, sorry about misquoting Men at Work in the last blog. I can’t believe that the team of NBC.com fact checkers missed that. I kind of like my version better, but Colin Hay is a genius and deserves better than to have his lyrics mangled. I stand by the vegemite sandwich comment.

So I took a couple of weeks off from writing the blog (and we were not on last week – so strictly speaking it was one week). I come back to find that people have started to post in greater numbers, and now that we are 5 hours into the show there are a lot of comments and questions, as well as the simmering vat of angry musings I came to so enjoy last year. So here are some answers to some of your burning questions and concerns.

The first two are regarding our talent scout Ant:

John writes:
aunt needs to go back to his old hair style... looks way to fake and he wears more makeup then tammy faye baker.

Answer:
I can’t tell you how much I love the fact that you think his name is Aunt.

Doc writes:
A note to the hair-club-for-men gay judge: When you instruct a contestant to "exit stage left," don't wave in the direction of stage right. And for the show's producers, you might want to discontinue the promos in which he screws this up.

Answer:
We’ll get right on that. Now shouldn’t you be getting to the Drama club meeting?

Prince writes:
I am wondering who is paying off the judges That Iva La'shawn was seriously funny and they never showed her again after saying we will see you back tonight ...... then ooops no more. Did you think we wouldn't remember someone as hilarious as she was????

Answer:
First of all, Prince, I had no idea you were such a fan of comedy. Iva was hilarious in her audition – she did the thing about the crackhead relative asking for baloney through the letterbox, then in her call back did a set in which there was literally nothing we could put on air. Dick jokes and gags about crabs are not going to cut it on NBC in prime time. However, we loved her crackhead bit so we put it in.

Big Daddy writes:
Hey, my partner (The Goober) and I are HUGE fans of the show, but I have to air our grievances this season. JUST BECAUSE YOU ARE GAY OR A BLACK WOMAN DOES NOT MAKE YOU FUNNY! We are the epitome of non-racist, non-sexist, non-homophobic radical liberal Berkeley artsy folk. But with your gay, lesbian and black "talent scouts" we're noticing a TON of fantastic comics falling by the wayside in favor of more "politically correct" but far less humorous comedians.

Answer:
Are you trying to tell me that Mel Silverback is gay? He claims to have been Dian Fossey’s lover. No one set out to make the talent scouts the Minority Team. They just happened to be very funny alumni of the show. And I honestly don’t know what you’re talking about. Who are all these gay comics that are taking the places that should have been given to funnier straight comics? As you’ll see next week at the semi-finals, the Alex Theater is not exactly overrun by the lavender mafia. I’ll grant you that Doug Benson is kind of gay. By the way, why would two “radical liberal Berkeley artsy folk” go around calling themselves “Big Daddy and The Goober” complaining about too many gay comics? I’m sensing a conspiracy here, and the giveaway is your names. Those are CB handles if I ever heard them. If you’re serious about changing the show I suggest you start a convoy and bring mayhem to the 101 freeway.

Pamf writes, in a similar vein
Why is your show so gay? 6 out of 15 choices were gay, if they were the funniest no problem but...c'mon and what do your judges/producers have against funny, attractive, hetrosexual dames, hey forget the hetro just sexual any little bit of sexuality will do. But, at LCS we like to create the stereotype that women are only funny if they are asexual and of no threat to mediocre and insecure judges and producers.

Answer:
OK you got us. In our mediocre and insecure way we are threatened by attractive female comics. Just don’t tell NBC – they seem to think that the public wants to see beautiful funny women. We know better. Also, please don’t let on about our secret plan to fill the show with gay comics. So far it seems to be working. Let’s not blow it now.

Next week it’s the first semi-final. No doubt some of you may have varying opinions about the comics chosen to move on. And no doubt we’ll be hearing from you. Talk to you then.

COMMENTS

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I hope america gets rid of that hick from hickory his blatent plagorism of the first simpsons episode was word for word.(rock a by baby)i hope he does not get away with it america.

too bad you let ralph go. he's the main reason my wife and i watched the show. something is really wrong with that. better luck next year i guess.

I was very dissappointed in the first elimination of Dante & Gina.The way you portrayed it on TV was vastly different than the way it actually went down.Due to editing you made Dante & Gina's acts look bad compared to Ralph's(which by audience members reccolection,was mediocre at best and you showed the only funny part).Is it also true that the entire audience did not vote and only 'randomly' selected members did?At least be truthful-Dante went 1st,then Gina and it was nearly an hour after the 1st set that voting started-so whoever is last is more memorable...The heckling spot is SOOO bad that it was hard to watch-especially with the editing.The point is to show how well the comics handle the heckler not drown them out and repeat their act back!Deborah G. didn't even heckle the big guy,so no wonder he won...I think with better editing your ratings would be better and less commercials/more comedy!

Hmmmm.... does it still seem like a good idea to you that you put the APE through? In his semi-final performance he didn't even make a live audience laugh. I'm only bitter about it because Richard Ryder's smell of cookies line was so funny that I still pee my pants laughing everytime I pass by a car with On-star - and corny APE was chosen over him. Ahhh, regrets...

(PS I think he was better than the cat lady, too - but at least she was funny)

I CANNOT believe that you didn't put John Caparulo through. Such a disappointment. I understand that you HAD to pick a few girls to meet your "quota" but come on!!! And, for the record, So You Think You Can Dance is based on talent...not whether you're a boy or girl!

I CANNOT believe that you didn't put John Caparulo through. Such a disappointment. I understand that you HAD to pick a few girls to meet your "quota" but come on!!! And, for the record, So You Think You Can Dance is based on talent...not whether you're a boy or girl!

the cat lady??? are you serious?? come on. over the lesbian? they both basically made fun of themselves but the lesbian was so much funnier in her delivery. ridiculous.

What happened to the female that made it from the London show? She isn't inculded in the final 32.

Dan thanks for your clever and witty insight. I love the judges...Ant and Kathleen crack me up. And I loved that you kept alicia's comments on Ant's hair in the Los Angeles episode...shows he and the show have a sense of humor. My tivo says the semi's are 2 parts. Is this true? LONG LIVCE LCS!

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