I think they're going to get a long just fine.

This Donkey Kong seems very friendly. He doesn't seem overprotective (of the Princess) like he is in the video game. He just seems to be stronger than he realizes. Maybe that's why the Smurf is missing an arm and a foot.
Maybe Donkey went to shake his hand and broke it off by mistake. And the reason Brainy is pissed, is because now he only has one hand to do all his nerd activities like write, solve math problems, and spell dirty words on the calculator.

When I found this Donkey Kong doll, I screamed with joy, but on a low level, because i didn't want to cause a scene in the thrift store. When i found this ceramic Smurf, i was really excited - and confused - because he's white. It's as if the painter either had never seen the Smurfs & didn't know that they're skin is blue - or maybe he's bigoted against blue Smurfs, so he made this one white. Or maybe this is a very rare white Smurf that people haven't seen often because he's afraid of the sun. It's very confusing. But also interesting.

I'll ask Liz Lemon if I can write a sketch about a white Smurf & Donkey Kong hangin' out. Not sure if she'll dig it, I think she's more of a Dungeons & Dragons person.

Talk soon.

Frank

I was doing more cleaning at my apartment. For the past 3 weeks, whenever friends call me and ask me what I’m doing, I say “Cleaning my apartment”. And they say, “That’s what you said last week”. And I say, “Well, I’m still cleaning it”. I try but I can’t help it - I’m a pack rat. I got a lot of stuff to clean. Anyways, when I was cleaning, I found an old Hulk Hogan mask. So, here’s a picture of me wearing it. I can’t remember where I picked this up. Probably at a thrift shop about 10 years ago. I initially bought it ‘cause I’m a wrestling fan, and I thought it might be funny to use in a sketch or a short movie. If I ever see something that could be a prop in a sketch, I get it. I still haven’t used this mask in a sketch. And don’t worry, I would not wear this to work, I think Liz Lemon would fire me if I did. Maybe Jenna could wear it in a sketch? That could be funny. And it would definitely piss off Jenna if she had to wear it.
Cool.

Frank

But I'm happy today, because I just found $20 bucks in the pocket of a dirty pair of jeans that was laying under a giant pile of stuff in my apartment. Now I can go buy a NEW George Foreman grill! But first, I'm going to go to my favorite kielbasy store. Steve's Meat Market in Greenpoint! Yeah!!!

Maybe I'll bring some kielbasy into TGS. Believe me, I'm not the type of guy who sucks up to people. But one thing I know about Liz Lemon, she can get angry at me when I haven't done work I'm supposed to have done. And when she's hungry - she can get angrier than normal. So, if I bring her food, maybe she'll be nice to me today. Especially since I haven't finished those re-writes yet.

Frank

I thought I’d get a lot of work done during the strike break, like write my novel about Bigfoot stealing a spaceship & going to Daytona to pick up hot chicks while solving crimes on the side. But I didn’t get much work done. Besides growing a strike beard, here’s a couple things I did do.

I had a stand-up gig in the Poconos. I didn’t hook up with any chicks, like I’d hoped. But, my room did have a nice jacuzzi that I got to enjoy all by myself.

I’ve decided to stop taking the bus & subway to work. I now bike to work. Biking is fun. I get to race dogs that chase after me. And I get to exercise and get in even better shape for the ladies.

Some people watch horror movies to prepare for Halloween. I prepare for Halloween by beating up horror movie boogeymen. That’s right ladies, if you need a personal bodyguard on Halloween...Come talk to me. I’ll protect you from the evils of the night.

Well, I just finished decorating my Mom’s house for Halloween. She’s been yelling at me for the past couple weeks. She likes to have the Halloween decorations go up right after Labor Day. So, I was kind of late this year. Hopefully, these ghosts will scare the hell out of some of my annoying neighbors. Don’t get me wrong. Most of the neighbors are cool. But some are really annoying. I tried to get some of the gang from TGS to help me put up the decorations, but they all said they were busy. Halloween is two weeks away - so, my Mom will probably make me put up some more decorations before the big night. But for right now it’s good enough.

I’m going to dress up for Halloween this year. I think I’m going to dress up as my foot - when it had that alien thing growing out of it. See my blog entry from May 20th to know what I’m talking about.

Halloween is a fun holiday. There’s always new new horror movies, chicks dress slutty and strangers give you free candy!

Talk soon.

Frank

These are some of the scariest looking cakes I’ve ever seen. They’re pretty nasty looking. I don’t think anyone would eat them. I take that back…Jenna would eat them.

Jenna’s gotten so fat, when she moves, I can’t even get her in focus.

I’m glad to be back writing on TGS. The summer was rough. I lost all my money this summer went I went to AC. (For those of you who don’t know – that’s Atlantic City). I used to be really good at black jack. But something happened. I thought the casino was cheating me. So I went to another one. And lost even more money. Then I had to quit ‘cause I was out of cash.

A vicious white tiger on the prowl…but unbeknownst to him… A 700 foot tiger right behind him!

New York has the most beautiful women in the world. And as this photo shows, New York has the hottest mannequins too. And these mannequins aren’t even finished. Imagine how hot they’d be if they were fully grown. They’re only half done. I’m gonna keep walking around the New York City streets to see if I can find the rest of these mannequin chicks’ bodies. I don’t know how or why they only have half their bodies. Maybe someone stole the top halves. Or, maybe the top halves split apart and jumped off the bottoms and walked away using their hands and stump to propel themselves around. If I see a the top half of a mannequin walking around with her hands, I’m totally gonna help her find the rest of her body. And then I’ll ask her out. (I know, you’re saying, "mannequin’s can’t talk or hear". Well, all i gotta say is, "I guess you’ve never seen the movie, MANNEQUIN"… That’s what I love about New York: there’s always hot chicks and there’s always something interesting going on.

Frank

I think the trouble started over the summer when I got addicted to watching Steven Seagal movies before going to bed. The movies would get me so pumped, I couldn’t go to sleep. So then, I’d watch another one. And wouldn’t fall asleep ‘til around 7am. Seagal’s got a lot of movies, and he’s got a new one straight to DVD every couple weeks. So, it’s become a lot of work, staying up all night & keeping track of his movies. My favorites are “Marked for Death”; where the plot is: he beats up Jamaica. (Pretty much everyone in Jamaica except for about 2 people). And my other favorite is “Out for Justice” where the plot is: he beats up Brooklyn. (Well, not everyone in Brooklyn, just everyone in Bensonhurst).

I think this is a picture of Jenna’s old boyfriend.
She says she used to date a model.
That’s why I don’t wear underwear like this.
Keeps me from looking like a douche.
And keeps Jenna away from me.

Frank