Accessibility

Division of NBC Universal

spotlight. on nbc

SNL Full Episodes

SNL Full Episodes

Watch the latest episodes with Taylor Swift, January Jones & more online. Click Here »

Creed Thoughts

www.creedthoughts.gov.www\creedthoughts

July 12, 01:12 PM

Creed Thoughts


Visors are hats for people that like getting ripped off.


Here’s the thing about handcuffs: there’s only one key for all of them. It’s not like the Tampa cops have their own special key and the Saskatchewan Mounties have a different one. They’re all the same. So the one true goal in any criminal’s life is to get a copy of the handcuff key. I’ve got thirty. If you want to buy one, you know where to find me.

What ever happened to free love, man? Now I’m paying ten, fifteen dollars for it.


My favorite part of the newspaper is the fun little stories about the dead people and their relatives.


Do you remember where I parked my van?


A pinky’s always a pinky, but a pointer and a ring finger are pretty interchangeable if you need them to be.


There’s nothing better than a wishing fountain. Go ahead, idiots, keep throwing your cash away. Old Creed will make those wishes come true.


I’ve got an idea.


About thirty years ago, I fell in love with a blond woman. She wore vests and skirts and had flowers in her hair. I think her name was Nancy. If you’re out there, Nancy, I’m not mad at you anymore. You can keep the hundred bucks you stole. I just want you back. And my birth certificate.


Books are great when you can’t find a pillow.


Reminder: Michael's safe combo: 2-33-26

Comments (47) permalink
Posted by Creed at 01:12 PM

COMMENTS

Pages:    1 |  2  |  3  |  4  |  5 

Creed - you are the bestest ever!

Posted by Bob Cumbers
July 12, 2007

10 or 15 is pretty cheap

Posted by Anonymous
July 12, 2007

Hope to hear that idea next week.....oh yeah, your van is parked outside by the dumpster. Not sure why ??

Posted by Karen B
July 12, 2007

Creed,
The kids just told me recently that you are on the office. Congratulations. I've caught a couple of shows and love it. We're living in Florida but will be coming back to CA in the near future. All the best from Ruth and me.

Posted by Jack McMahon
July 12, 2007

hey, creed! are you sure about that handcuffs thing? 'cuz i can't take any chances. how much you selling em for? i ain't paying more than 10 bucks.

Posted by kd b
July 12, 2007

You are a wise, wise man Creed. I have taken your words and I will remember them. These are things that every human alive should take heed to and live their daily life with.

Posted by Chicbn872
July 12, 2007

Creed, it's me Nancy. I want you back. I've watched "The Office" from the beginning and I saw an episode that reminded me of the time we stole Michael's desk. Those were good times. I didn't appreciate you staring up that wise-cracking receptionist. Call me.

Posted by Nancy
July 12, 2007

Creed,
I don't know about this Nancy chick but feel free to call me.
xoxo (;

Posted by Brittany
July 12, 2007

Creed,
Middies and pointers ARE interchangeable...but not if you need to put them on another hand. Then they're all backwards...which, come to think of it, might just be pretty awesome.

Posted by Corey
July 12, 2007

You're the man, Creed!

Posted by Dan
July 12, 2007

Post Your Comments Here

         
  Name: Remember  
  Email: Personal Info?  
  URL:  
  Comments:    
Small print: All html tags except [b] and [i] will be removed from your comment. You can make links by just typing the url or mail-address.